Infinite Benevolence

Four of Swords

pulled as my cross card

meaning immediate obstacles

this card is read both upright and reverse

but this is beneficial

upright is rest/meditation

reverse is healthy activity, circumspection, precaution, guarded advancement.

I need both right now.

This path requires us to recognize that there is no scarcity in the Universe. On this path we achieve wholeness through compassionate acceptance. The 4 of Swords, the thinking aspect of our personality on this path, represents deep meditation, going inside oneself to find connection to all and in turn to find right thought. 

The figure in this card is in what the Yogi of the East would call corpse pose, Sav Asana. The three swords point down to the figure’s key chakras and the fourth sword runs parallel to the figure’s spine, energy core. In the stain glass window above we see a benevolent figure administering to a supplicant. Stain-glass is a signal to pay attention and get honest perception of the situation. Honest perception of what is going on inside your self. Wholeness, for the thinking aspect of your personality, on this path is found by looking within yourself for the solution to how to take care of others and one self.

 

 This is the "meditation" card. The card advises the Querent that they need to get away, rest, recuperate. Especially after the Three of Swords!

Four of swords indicates that the Querent has been facing mental or emotional stress, arguments, misunderstandings or verbal abuse, or that they're ill or injured. A healing retreat is needed, time to clear the head, heart and soul, or just fix a damaged body. In this case, the stillness of the "4" is healing and positive. A quiet, unchanging scene is needed. 

The Four of Swords is a time of rest and recuperation so that you can assimilate those potential hurts and loss experienced in the Three of Swords.  Deciding you require friends rather than lovers or partners for the time being. Finding people with similar interests and ideas. Solace in the group.

Seclusion. You need seclusion to deal properly with your situation. Retreat from pain, conflict and distractions, and rid yourself of stress and anxiety. Ground and re-charge yourself. Look inward for a real change. Meditate daily. 

The Four of Swords indicates our need to spend time alone to re-evaluate our lives and situations. Solitude, although often difficult to bear, is necessary for us to be able to "recharge our batteries" and rejuvenate our spirits. This solitary experience always bears fruit in an experience of greater inner strength and confidence. If we are able to face ourselves directly and not run away from our difficulties we will ultimately become more alive and more aware of the good in our lives, and we will develop the inner strength necessary to cope more readily in the future. 

This card represents the negotiating mind, the conflict/resolution mind, or the meditating mind. In any kind of negotiation, one must be open to staying in balance and non-positional. The truce-making process is a four fold process that's experienced on all four levels of consciousness, mental, emotional, spiritual, and physical.  In order for truce to be truly experienced, one must show up, pay attention, tell the truth, and not be attached to the outcome. The results of this is renewal and regeneration. This usually means that in the next four weeks, or next four months, there will be an opportunity for truce making or conflict resolution or negotiation of important issues or with important people in your life.

spin and tumble

Sun setting into sea

we spin backwards

falling into the darkness

the moon will meet us halfway

then we will continue to tumble forward

into tomorrows light

The Reading

The great E. King read my Tarot for me.

Lesson 1-Temperance

I possess this gift. 

It exists half the time in me. But I lose it's grace just as much.

This card represents the atmosphere in which I presently exist in.

I will heed it's message and lessons.

 

Temperance is acutely aware of the passage of time, and the affect her actions through time have on all areas of life. 

Her broad vision gives her the clarity she needs to behave with great care and respect at every moment.

 Temperance also means moderation. This archetype teaches us how to walk the middle road, the path of least resistance, and to be in the here and now...observing the flow and the best possible role for each of us within that flow.

In another sense, Temperance refers to toughening, as in tempered steel - through many rounds of heating and cooling. 

This one has seen much, and walked down many roads - she is able to proceed with an objective awareness about the feelings and needs of others.

Descent/Ascent

And so it goes.

I feel so alive. I feel so like dying.

I suppose both are happening simultaneously.

I am shining and energized. I am weak and disturbingly agitated.

At night, all night, I fall down a dark rabbit hole.

Seems endless.

By day I scramble back up the sides and seek light. Seek perspective.

Moments of brilliance blindside me. But only for a moment.

 

                                                                                                            DESCENT

Deadwood standing, blown away, snapped and split.

Left in the dark, getting soaked, waiting for salvage.

Wish someone could strap it back together.

But its gotten too destroyed and messy.

ASCENT

This is who I want to be. This is who I AM!

Leave the treehouse of security and fly into the uncertainty of freedom.

Shine you diamond soul!

Learn to feel everything with truth and I will ascend to the most beautiful heights.

Total Freedom

Some Krishnamurti insights

Reflective of all the questions and challenges I see friends around me profoundly experiencing right now....including me.

We, who are facing the beautiful beastly creature that is truthful transformation, are completely in-tune with all things celestial at this time on the planet.

Know that you are in the right place.  Exactly where you should be.

From TOTAL FREEDOM - The Essential Krishnamurti

(thanks to dear Jesse for suggesting this to me)

To Be A True Human Being:  

What we call happiness or ecstasy is, to me, creative thinking. 
And creative thinking is the infinite movement of thought, emotion, and action.
That is, when thought, which is emotion, which is action itself, is unimpending in its movement, is not compelled or influenced or bound by and idea, and does not proceed from the background of tradition or habit, then that movement is creative.

Sorrow:

Do you want to escape from suffering, or to be free from it? 
If you merely want to escape, then a pill, a belief, an explanation, an amusement, may "help", with the inevitable consequences of dependence, fear, and so on. 
But if you wish to be free from sorrow, you must stop running away and be aware of it without judgment, without choice; you must observe it, learn about it, know all the intimate intricacies of it.
Then you will not be frightened of it, and there will no longer be the prison of self-pity.

 

Love:

Love Can only come into being when there is total self-abandonment.

Love is something this is new, fresh, alive. It has no yesterday and no tomorrow.
It is beyond the turmoil of thought. It is only the innocent mind which knows what love is, and the innocent mind can live in the world, which is not innocent. 
To find this extraordinary thing which man has sought endlessly through sacrifice, through worship, through relationship, through sex, through every form of pleasure and pain, is only possible when thought comes to understand itself and comes naturally to an end. 
Then love has no opposite, then love has no conflict.
But you dont know how to come to this extraordinary fount, so what do you do?
If you dont know what to do, you do absolutely nothing, dont you? Absolutely nothing. 
Then inwardly you are completely silent.  Do you understand what that means?
It means that you are not seeking, not wanting, not pursuing; there is no center at all.  

Then there is love.

Dark Days

Moving towards becoming includes both light and dark.

I dip in and out of these states rapidly.

Testing the extreme waters of this yin/yan way.

It is exhausting and exhilarating all at once.

It is a loss of self while at the same time a gaining of self.

Fear facing. Strong wind in the face. Brilliant sun in the eyes.

Calm water cure.

Make you laugh Make you cry

Have you experienced the Double Rainbow sensation?

Was it anything like this guy's experience?

I laughed I cried and I laughed again.

We are all brimming with emotion, asking the big question:
What does it mean?

http://www.youtube.com/watch?v=OQSNhk5ICTI&feature=related

Emotional Pictogram

It came & went

"The blacker the night, the more brilliant the sunrise."

Snippets of Hurricane Earl from my POV.

Hunkered down at home alone and had an emotional hurricane of my own.

Left both the front and back door open so the wind could whip thru the house. 

Cleanse out dreary energy to make space for fresh energy.

Power down.  Candle lit dinner.  A night walk through a blackened city.

This morning I swept the leaves out of the hall and back room.

Picked up the pieces. And stepped out into a cool, bright, clear day.  

A wander thru Point Pleasant Park lead me to a patch of young maple shoots flashing their glistening silver backsides.

Like the ruins I was run down but secure in my place.  Full of character and potential and history and alive with regeneration.

Stripped bare, standing tall, among a camas blue sky.

Eye of the storm

While waiting for pending storm the only thing left to do is go to the beach and get churned around for a few hours.

Wind swept and wave lashed.

Overcooked and boggie boarded out.

Was a glorious day but has left me a emotionally beached.

Photo (taken by Andrea D) of me looking so serious.  I  just had sand in my eye.

Current emotional condition: unattractively pixelated and over analyzed

RayBan Bliss

As the heat wave continues I sink into a sweaty delirium.

Everything seems surreal and stagnant.

Slept on the backyard porch last night.

My best friend right now is this old metal rose colored Electrohome fan.

She is a beaut...but dont get to close....she could take a piece out of you!

The dogs are motionless, soggy wet noodles in the back yard.

Apparently dirt is cool and inviting.

 

Tonight we will all go jump in a lake.

This is the coolest use of RayBan Sunglasses I have ever seen: